If I...

If I could,
If I can,
If I have the capability,
If I have the ability,
If I have the strength,
If I have the believe,
If I have the freedom,
Then everything would be possible!

Hahaha.. yes! all those Ifs.. where am I going with it? Crap.. I totally lost it.. hahaha.. Okay.. I've seen the term of "give and take" like many many times now.. I mean it! haha.. yes! it's all about give and take. When u have the willingness to give, u shouldn't be hoping for getting the same thing back. And that thing, could mean err a favor, treatment or whatever. No expectations! owh gosh.. how many times have I been saying the no expectation thing! haha.. But of course.. there is a bigger chance that u might receive the same amount of favor or treatment when u are willing to give those to others. Although this might not always hold, it is true to some extend.

p/s: This is not a lecture nor words of wisdom. It's my personal opinion.. haha feel
free to criticise. =) your voice is worth a million dollars ( in the value sense!! dont ever ask me to pay u that! hahaha.. owh ya.. maybe in monopoly =P ). We learn from other people's criticism. Thank them for those.

yay! enough of craps.. for those who are thinking negative which is also known as ---------------------------------- thinkers! I am going to multiply all your -------------------------- thinking by ---------------------------- . Common sense will give u the answer of ++++++++++++++++++++++++ yes! + thinker! that is what we want to see.. i think that is high school math.. hahaha.. revise it if u did not get it!

now now.. I just signed up for a new phone contract yesterday.. hehee.. I got a new phone! Sony ericsson W580i.. shake control thing.. but i havent been playing around wit it.. kinda new to sony ericsson la... the light at the side looks really tight! ahah.. i think sexay's phone has that too! hahaha the disco lights if u would like to call it that.. hahaha!

tadaaaaaaaaa..!




owh yah! haha today i saw this incredible, stunning color display right above my desk on the wall. It was so cool! hahaha.. my housemate took a picture of it.. after that i found out it was just the reflection of my cd..LOL =.= but still cool.. now it actually appears on my water cup.. hehe.. some ppl call my cup a vase.. because its huge! haha 750ml! =) haha.. ya.. i think flowers could probably survive for months if it were to be use as a vase.. haha.. and its transparent.. keke..

Looks like my post is full of rubbish.. haha nvm! i dont care! kekeke.. owh.. i learned a new song today... maybe not new for some of u.. LOL i saw that guy from guess guess guess.. and i thought his song is kinda tight and i pick up my guitar and started playing! whooo laaaa .. I got the chorus! hahaha donno if u guys heard of him.. his name is tsai ming yo.. can we actually type in chinese characters in blogspot? hmmm.. not sure. hahaha..

ow yah owh yah! wai kit left san jose and got back to chicago.. remember that pathetic guy that i told u guys about? hehe he's back in Chicago now.. before he left, we had a tiny farewell party for him.. and we kinda got drunk.. hahaha.. here are some footage of the Drinking game that we played! hehe..

WOW.. this thing took quite a while to upload.. 59megs!! ow gosh.. haha.. hmm i doubt you guys can view it like smoothly.. hahaa.. anyway, thats it for now.. take care all! remember.. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Wah! U so long only post one..

Hahahah! yes! i totally agree with u szeee.. kekekeke.. thats what causes higher demand u seee... hahaha =P

hmmm.. lets see.. it's 2008! I know, I know. It's late isn't it? ahhaha.. happy new year everyone.. at least the Chinese one is coming soon... RARH! which means it will be the second one that i missed! missed as in spend it in US.. with no relatives.. but a few, I mean it! a few! friends.. hahaha.. alrite alrite.. New year New style huh? have you guys noticed the two clocks that i added onto my blog! hahaa.. its for the convenience of YOU PPL.. Yes you PPL out there to figure out what is the time difference in between my beloved Malaysia and United States.. West coast at least.. okay! new format! PARAGRAPH!

THis is a new paragraph.

This is another new paragraph.

This is not a new paragraph but a new sentence..

"ehhh.. lame wei!!!" This must be what u ppl are thinking now.. seee.. I anticipated it! hehehe.. cool eh? for all of you who think paragraphing is lame, Think TWICE or MORE if you still dont get it! ahhahaha.. but if u think jian wei is lame.. U are probably on the right track! hehehehe.. coz he is! rarh!

Now now.. back to life.. L.I.F.E huh? so what do u think the L means? I would say Love.. agree? hehehe.. now how bout I? hmmm.. Independent would be the answer for now.. and F.. Failure! yeah man! thats true.. there are always failure in one's life.. and E... Entertainment! weeeeee... yes yes.. It is so important that i doubt someone could live without it.. hahahahah...

So what have my LIFE been doing to me? Work! yes.. i started workin again on thursday and have been working for the past 4 days.. Thank my sweet mama that it is a public holiday today.. weeeeee.. the things on my to do list have not been done yet.. cleaning up my room is one of them.. as u might remember from the previous absolutely amazing images of how NICE my room is.. hehehe...

To Sze, ehhh.. the sony ericsson W580i good ar? hahaha.. im thinking of getting it because my phone contract is ending this month.. hehehe.. its time to get a new phone.. i can get that phone for free.. weeeeeee.. but that comes wit a two years contract though.. hmmmm.. it definately looks nice.. hahaha

To LSZ, errr.. I don't really understand your post lar! whatever it means.. you sounded like a confused, Hurt-ed, Disappointed person.. cheer up man! i mean lady! lolx.. so u do believe in one true love huh? kekeke.. good luck in finding urs! =)

To Sexay, hahaha.. faster graduate so u can make it in time to extract my wisdom tooth.. its killlling meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..

Here are some photographs that i took in my recent ski trip.. hehehe..

Due to high demand..

HAHAHA.. yeap! due to "high" demand.. Here's an update on www.ji4n.blogspot.com.
yea rite.. high demand.. hahaha.. only one audience actually.. which is our famous or infamous SEXAY dentist! the one which we will one day seek for help.. Not the fairy tooth fairy? BUt a xing gan dentist! who worked so hard for it. =)

ALrite alrite.. enuff of stories bout sexay dentist that i missed so much .. =P back to the real deal!

Once upon a time, there was a boy named wai kit. He was a pathetic guy living in a cold and snowy house.....

oooops.. where were i going with that!!? hahaha.. breakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk~~

ehem ehem, okay.. back to business. It's Winter break!! weeeeeeee.. which means i have one whole long month or rather a short break. Here's how my winter break starts:

1) Arrival of wai kit. My INTI college mate. He's a fine guy as i introduced to u all in my short fairy tale story.. haha.. tadaaa~


2) Reason for wai kit's visit: He has no where to stay in his cold cold Chicago. All his frens were going home. Last but not least, he wanted to visit me in San jose! so he can travel around California. =P

3) Trip to LA
It was the Best trip ever! "best" as you can see in my facebook. I've uploaded some of the photographs there. Why am I saying it was the best trip ever? guess what? it was a tight budget trip. I was cool with that at first because my fren did not want to spend too much on the trip. First and foremost, we stayed in Hollywood Hostel right in the middle where all the Hollywood attractions are. The best thing is, it only cost us 17 dollars a night~! Sounds cool huh? haha.. attached is a photograph that we took in the room. We had so many different roommates. there were 6 ppl in a room.




The hostel was not too bad as it was clean and tidy. There wasn't any SCARY ppl too. luckily. Hahha.. It all went bad when I start to get sick! and then wai kit got sick too. We are still unsure of the cause of these sickness! hmmm.. Probably due to the polluted air in LA or the HOSTEL! haha.. unknown. Anyways. the wind in LA was super strong. I think it goes up to 50 MPH! we find it so cold that i regret not to bring my ski jacket. Its even hard to walk around. This is what made the trip the "best" ever. Sickness, cold, lost, bla bla bla.

4) The Wax museum in Hollywood. The stuffs there was so cool. ALthou they wasn't as real as we saw in the photographs. It was still kinda.. sort of REALISTIC. haha..




hmmm.. That's about it for this time. As im still sick. hahaha.. rarh! I miss all the ppl in Msia! U all must be having so much fun back in Msia. WHere as Im sick here.. In the cold cold US. owh.. there was a thing that cheered me up thou.. hehee.. I PASSED my ENglish! hehehehe.. and my results was better than expected too. =) i got all A's hahaha! 1 A- and 1 A+ .. hehehe..

Owh yah.. lastly, LSZ.. have u been working hard towards the lucky number 47? hahaha.. if not, u better do. owh! It's sze's birthday rite? HAPPY BIRTHDAY SZEEE~
guess u will get another surprise in MSIA! hahaa.. so many sistas! haha.. cool! have a superb birthday! may u be happy always! =) and happy belated birthday to yin too! =)

THats it peep. Take care of yourself and hmmm.. HAVE FUN for the sake of ppl who are stuck in a place where he has no close ones to refer to when he's lost.. hahaha.. lalalal.. rite...

and they live happily ever after.......... (just to finish up the fairy tale intro ;P)

It's my 60th post!!

hahaha yes yes! it's my 60th post.. so what? LOL nth.. =P errrrrrr... Donno how i end up here writing stuffs. Will be having my first finals this semester in like an hour time! and it would be a credit or no credit class: ENGLISH!! to be more accurate, it is Remedial English.. so People.. please pray hard for me! hahaha.. As i really need to pass the class.. It's really slowing me down on my degree progress.. Which means i will need a longer time before i get back to MSia.. hahaha RARH!

Hmmm.. Been kinda tired these days. I don't know why.. Probably is because of my tiny lil bed.. I'm just to huge to fit in the tiny little bed! when i put my legs straight while lying on the bed.. it only covers up to my knees! hahaha.. haih.. I probably should get a better bed. Besides, i think it might be due to my work! rarh! i started working 2 days ago. The first day was okay.. as it was pretty lay back style work.. hahahaha.. the second day was tough! i dont even get a break which i should.. I worked 5 hours straight! hahah it's been a while since i have to stand for that long! my feet sores like crap!

Sexay wanna come to US? Go and apply for your VISA la! hahaha.. bring ur frens along too.. kekekeke..

TIme to prepare!

" This is where we HOLD'em; THis is where we FIGHT! "
300! LOL Spartans!

owh! if u are wondering where's that messy place is.. MAke a WILD guess.. U should be right! hahaha..

Back from Reno!

yes! I'm back from Reno! it's a place with casinos! ahhaha just like a mini vegas. They are in the same state thou.. Besides, i also went to Northstar Resort for skiing! ahhaa.. it was fun to watch ppl falling down all the time when i don't fall anymore.. whahahahahaha! A fine weekend like this is what i need to forget about all the problems and stresses.. ahha U all should try it out too! =)

Anyway, I've seen ppl who are getting holidays soon! rarh! so do I! just a little longer time to go for me. That means my finals is coming real soon! the first paper will be on this Saturday. The weird thing is that I still hav classes after my first final paper. WHAT THE HECK!!? hahaha.. let's hope I can survive to the finals with all the colors of the world. I mean all! more than all those on the rainbow. haha and i hereby wish that everyone who is having finals or any exams or watever in life to pass with flying, floating, superb colors! hahaa.. omgosh im late for tutor.. I need help for physics... Till then.. jian signing off! weeee...

My Love Will Get You Home (song)

Spell?

Lost...

How many times have i been lost? losing my identity. not knowing who i am. Who i am to others. I don't know.. probably many times.. Just had a Sam Adams light beer. Been drinking quite frequently now.. mostly at nite. Guess i want to not remember that im lost. but even after a drink. nth changes. its like.. im still having the same feelings.. but a lil bit more numb on the outside thou.. but the inside nvr change..

Why do i have these worries inside me? worry that i might brokedown one day knowing that there's no meaning for my existence. Knowing that i might not be needed in the world. As they all get their own meaningful ones.. i will just be ditched aside..

I don't know what should i do now.. Going back to Malaysia doesn't seem so special now and a part of me wanted to go back but another part of me doesn't. I wanted to experience winter here. but how about the coming summer? should i go back? probably not because i want to take some summer courses so that i can grad in a shorter period of time. Not only that. there's some issues with my apartment rental. As im renting wit two other msian girls. we are sharing the rent of the apartment. So, if i were to go back to msia in summer. the rent goes on because there is no reason for me to not have to pay for my part of the rent when im not around. the only solution is to not go home OR to find someone who wants to stay in my room for summer. That's kinda hard as i have most of my stuffs in my room. How is that person going to live in my room with all my stuffs there.. I would be too lazy to shift out all my stuffs to empty my room for that person. Crap! see.. its not like i dont want to go back.. i just have all these stuffs to worry about. So, please stop asking me to go back as part of me wanted to but i cant for some understandable reasons..

Guess im kinda drunk now.. or maybe i wanted to be drunk and i get drunk easily. Look how many time si used drunk in this paragraph.. probably im drunk. probably im not drunk.. Okay.. i sound like im drunk now..

These days are weird.. I always look in my MSN and scroll down the list to see who's online. There are ppl who i have in mind to talk to. but for some reasons.. i stopped myself. I don't know what to talk to them. I always had this worry that they might be busy or they just dont wanna talk to me. Maybe its not the right time to talk to them.. all these craps! someone please help me.. is this normal? does anyone has the same experience?

Its probably due to past experience when i talk to them. they simply tell me that they are doing something or they have something to do.. that really makes me feel unneeded. unwanted or watever... its just.. disappointing! but i know i cant blame them. i just at least would like them to u know.. say hi to me first when they are free to do so.. haha.. probably i felt lonely now.. yeah.. i think i am.. pitiful me.

I'm going to have my last midterm in this semester on wednesday. What i did was a sheet of notes.. not completed yet.. sometimes i think my weakness is that i oversimplify stuffs.. everything.. i made them look simple to me.. but actually its not.. it's not easy to make things simple thou.. i guess its m weakness to OVERdo it! as my advise! never overdo something..

alrite.. i donno wat else to write.. i should probably just get some sleep and go shopping tmr! gilroy! the factory outlet town! ahahhaa... owh yeah.. i bought my clothing for skiing in thanksgiving.. ehehe... it costs me quite a lot.. i think more than 200 dollars.. but i just have to spend it once.. hopefully.. =)

My Love Will Get You Home

If you wander off too far, my love will get you home.
If you follow the wrong star, my love will get you home.
If you ever find yourself, lost and all alone, get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home. Boy, my love will get you home.

If the bright lights blinds your eyes, my love will get you home.
If your troubles break your stride, my love will get you home.
If you ever find yourself, lost and all alone, get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home. Boy, my love will get you home.

If you ever feel ashame, my love will get you home.
If its only you to blame, my love will get you home.
If you ever find yourself, lost and all alone, get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home. Boy, my love will get you home.

Hah! A song from "Heart of Greed". hmm.. let say its soft.. hahaha yeah! definitely a goodnite song... LOL.. anyone has any idea how to add songs to bloggie? hahaha.. i know i know.. its lame.. but just to add in something so i can share songs here as well.. hahaha..

Anyway, those are the pics of a game of broomball! ahhaa.. it was fun! but i can hardly breathe in the ice center. I don't know why. Probably of the cold air? haha its really cold.. never expect it to be that cold. anyways.. broomball is like ice hockey. Without skates. and brooms instead of the hockey stick.. LOL i donno wat they call it. wweeee! i scored 1 ! =P

This weekend was really a good one. Just had 2 midterms and the following should be so much less stress.. cause there's not as much homework or anything else to worry about. I finished Heart of Greed too! haha 40 episodes.. Basically my weekend is spent on Series, Basketball, Broomball. and other normal stuffs which im lazy to list them.

To those who are stress.. or maybe not doing that well. You should just look ahead! haha get back on your feet and seek jian wei for help. i will give u a push on your back. not too hard yet not too soft. Just enuff to keep you going. =) Guess i will need someone else to do that to me real soon. As i predict that i am going to be stressed up real soon.hahaha it's always like that.. maybe sometimes its good to tell ppl that everything is going to be ok. If that gives them hope to walk on the tough and rough and full of obstacles road! hehe.. but im sure it will be a superb outcome at the end.

Hmmm.. LSZ asked me to consider going back next summer. HAHA.. so i am! considering the pros and cons.. The last time i went back was not that beneficial. hahaha.. as i spent most my time playing dota, basketball? haha but its cool. I'll see how things goes ok? hehehe.. The thing is i've never experience a summer here yet. I've so far experience all other seasons.. at least im going too... haha.. Can't wait for the ski trip during thanksgiving.. Probably the only motivation now.. hahaha ski ski ski ski ski ski ski.. snowboard maybe? hahaha.. maybe maybe not maybe maybe not. LOL. omgosh.. is that what happens when ppl get hyper? hmmm.. probably.. i ate a lot of stuffs this weekend as i stayed in front of the lap top most of the time..

owh yah.. in the "Heart Of Greed" that guy writes a diary! haha.. he started after breaking up with the girl. can't believe he is writing every single day down for like 900 days? hahaha.. omg.. how can he take that? that's nuts.. hahaha.. hmmm any new songs to recommend? anyone? hehe.. thanks!

It's never too late?

What is meant by it's never too late? when u are late u are late.. of course.. some might say that its never too late to start all over.. but that is so much easier to be said than done.. a million to the power of a million harder!

I have two midterms.. one might be tomorrow which im not even sure.. and one is on thursday.. but it might be both on thursday too which i prefer.. if it is on tuesday it will definitely caught me unprepared.. and i will probably screw it up so badly that i would cry looking at it.. hahaha... dam! have been so stressed up! stress is beneficial huh? Not so.. when u have ulcers.. headache and feel like killing yourself.. There are just so many many things to be worried about.. homeworks.. assignments.. mid terms.. now adding in a malaysian club thing.. and work.. grrrr.. its really driving me nuts... although hamsters like nuts.. i do too.. but i don wanna go nuts! rarh! i dont wanna eat up myself..

i had a weird dream yesterday.. i once heard ppl said that if u remember ur dream.. u must've not slept well.. i guess so.. have been yawning in class non-stop.. and there's even tears in my eyes.. hahaha.. grrrrrr... stress stress and stress.. n e ways.. the dream was.. about a girl.. it's really weird.. she knows that im leaving soon.. to somewhere.. LOL.. and she made me this kinda.. errr album.. full of food and a lot alot of stuffs.. and it's like a really really long story written in a book.. i didnt read it in the dream as it was too long.. and i decided to keep the album till im free to read it.. haha maybe someday i shall read it in my dreams.. if it still exists..

rararara.. gtg class now.. let's see if i can get through this without having to give up anything.. i hate it when i have to choose between stuffs.. grrr.. but life is just full of choices.. this and that this and that this and that.. lalalala.. wateva la..